She hates birthdays.

There was once a girl who loved Birthdays. She would jump in excitement a month before. She would pester her mother to buy her a cute dress. She would tell everyone.. She would expect everyone to remember the date and wish her. She would take her mother to different shops until she finalized two dresses. Yet there was always something missing. Her 8year old self didn’t know what wishing at midnight meant. Her birthday started after sun rose. Her parents would wish her and dress her up.
Whole school would know it’s her birthday as she would flock her new dress while everyone sticked to their uniform. They didn’t need to remember the date. They would just know.
Sharing and distributing sweets was a excited task. Which always made her sad. There was always one other person who was also born on the same day in her class making her lose chance to take along a friend to distribute sweets.
She would forget no one asked her to accompany them on their B-Day either. Why was she always alone in spite of ‘friends’?
She would then go with her parents to buy her own birthday cake and then cut it in front of them. Yes boring. Yes there was no surprise.
Her gifts was always given from her parents.
She yearned to be special
She already knew she was special to her parents. But anybody else?

Her 14 year old self realized how boring it is to cut cake in front of parents and that too when she was the one to buy/select them.

That’s when she stopped it. Expecting she would find one friend who could make it special. Why does she need that attention?

Friends came and friends went.

Her 18year old self had got only three gifts together on the past 18 birthdays excluding the ones that her parents never failed to give her.

Her expectations never died. So did the disappointment.

Why is the gift important?
Why the girl who made birthdays of all the people around her special spent it with a sad face of knowing that her importance is always less?

She found best friends. Things changed. She gifted every friend of hers something special. Yet apart from calls she never received anything.

That’s when birthdays started as a disappointed days.

That’s why she is not interested anymore.

She still wonders why is it necessary to get gifts?

She still wonders why surprises is no important?

She can gift herself. She can now buy for herself.

Friends come and go. Her heart is the one to stay forever. Her mother is the one who never forgets to gift.

She hates birthdays.

Don’t ask me who is it. Don’t ask me why is she so silly. Don’t tell me it’s no big deal. Don’t tell me grow up. That little girl knows what disappointment is. None of her friends would ever know.  No, don’t pity her. She hates it.


6 thoughts on “She hates birthdays.

  1. Birthday have a special meaning I didn’t learn this till it was late in my life
    Nothing is silly if there is a meaning in your heart
    Or brings a smile to ones face
    It took me 62 years to understand certain things about life
    And silly is not one of them
    The Sheldon Perspective

    Liked by 1 person

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